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Femme Flavor

December 22, 2013

Growing up.

I just peeked into the mancave to see if Joshua was still asleep. Sure enough, crashed out with all his blankets wrapped around and around him. I recalled how my other younger brother used to love being wrapped “burrito-style” when I would tuck him in, and it made me smile to see Joshua sleeping the same way. Walking back to...

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December 10, 2013

Update.

I haven’t written anywhere in a long time. I’ve put it off, more out of a lack of motivation than an active writer’s block or similar obstacle. But, the only way to stop not-writing is… to write. Right? Right. So, hi. Here I am. My grandmother died at 1:50am on October 18. My aunt April, my sister Kayla, and I...

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October 6, 2013

My grandmother is dying.

That’s just the truth. And as I squint trough my tears to type this on my phone because yes, of course I want to post that awesome picture of us from Christmas but I can’t fucking stand to sit at my desk to write this on the mini instead of my iPhone because that not only makes it real but...

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August 17, 2013

I have depression.

This isn’t news to most of you; I’ve been “out” about my depression for a couple of years now, and have very little conscious shame or self-inflicted stigma around it. This post isn’t about what depression is, or how hard it is to live with an “invisible disease,” or to ask for support, patience, or any other thing someone in...

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June 2, 2013

Lesson learned? Eh, mebbe, mebbe not.

I re-read this post just now because this quote came to mind and I knew for certain that I had written about it before, so I searched my blog. Coincidentally, it was almost exactly a year ago, and the number of connections between the circumstances surrounding what I wrote then and what I feel tonight is rather astounding. Does this mean...

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June 1, 2013

No more excuses.

You are all full of ideas that need to become realities; if you weren’t, I wouldn’t be as devoted to and in awe of you as I am. A friend just posted this on Facebook. Read it. Please. If it also leaves you a sobbing mess of pride and shame and fear and new resolve, you know your idea is...

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May 12, 2013

Happy Mother’s Day?

So. I suppose a little back story is necessary here. My Mamau, my maternal grandmother, had a very serious heart attack three weeks ago. She’s been at Central Maine Medical Center since, due to unforeseen misadventures in open heart surgery, and to be honest, it’s scary as hell. Which is why I haven’t written about it – I’m not ready....

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April 19, 2013

Closure.

A friend of mine just posted something related to the Boston Marathon bombing and mentioned “closure” in a comment. In that moment, I thought about some writing I’ve done this week and some plans I’ve made for things I want to send out into the world either physically or electronically, and realized that that’s what they’re all about. Closure. It’s...

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March 31, 2013

False perceptions.

…that’s what social media allows – even prompts – us to portray. Be it “my life is so good; envy me,” or “my life is such shit, pity me,” or, “My life is so full I can’t even be bothered to care what you think.” I’ve had fleeting moments of that last, and it’s been a damned good feeling. Not...

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March 28, 2013

Revelation.

Sometimes lately I find myself going about my evening, or morning, or lunch break, or weekend, and half-jokingly asking myself or someone else, “Who is this person, and where’s the real Kirsten??” And tonight it hit me that, this IS the real Kirsten. Or at least, more so than I’ve ever been before. This is almost the Kirsten I’ve worked so...

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